Dear Massi, Please can you help me? I have married into a family of animals. They behave like ‘junglee jaanwar’ (jungle animals).

My mother-in-law actually hit her husband with a rolling pin in the middle of a heated argument.

My wife and her brother just sat back and watched. This scene was nothing new for them.

I had to get up and physically intervene.

I thought this was a one-off. During another argument the mother-in-law grabbed her husband’s dinner and threw it in the garden. Then she went on to stamp on it.

There is always a bad atmosphere in that house.

They are also very rude to other people when in public. I went to a wedding with them the first time and one of the brothers started fighting with a waiter.

What if my kids inherit this behaviour?

My family are not like this and I am embarrassed of them. J.

Massi Says, As disturbing as the scenes you witnessed are, it is unlikely that your wife’s parents behaviour is likely to change.

Your wife’s indifference to the arguments and fighting implies that this is something she and her siblings are accustomed to.

It is only natural that you are concerned that your own children don’t accept this behaviour to be the norm.

You need to reinforce this to your children yourself and explain that physical aggression is never the solution to a disagreement.

Also try not to make out you are better than them as this will only cause animosity between you and your wife. What you need to realise is that you did not marry the family but your wife. As long as your wife agrees their behaviour is a little odd then it is something you will have to put up with.