This is very much like the battle between good and evil but with more at stake.

In the beginning we was all the same.

Some of us wore Shalwaar Kameez and some of us wore the Kurta Pajama with a Gandhi cap.

The very brave among us wore the lunghi or the dhoti (a piece of cloth around the waist). This looked best when accompanied with a string vest and a large moustache.

There were also those who donned the full suit complete with waistcoats and a hat. Only on Sundays though at which point we would sit around the house and invite our fellow brothers into our small yet wonderful homes.

This, my dear friends, was an age when we were proud of our culture – our heritage. We were Pakistanis, Indians, Bengalis. It was a magnificent time to be alive.

For a while there was peace amongst the masses. That was until the Jubbah made an appearance.

Now, if you are going to get all offended with what I am about to write please look away now. Let us be brutally honest - the Jubbah is very much a ‘class’ thing.

Our forefathers wore their traditional dress because they were seen as the downtrodden but it didn’t matter to them.

But a growing number are keen to do away with the past because it embarrasses them.

Like the time the brother went to Dubai and wore the Shalwaar Kameez. For a whole day no-one took him seriously - when he visited the gleaming shopping centres, the staff scoffed as he tried on a Citizen watch.

The next day he donned a Jubbah and he got more respect. This experience changed him. He looked around him and the only people wearing the Shalwaar Kameez were the ‘slaves’.

Now, I know we like the Jubbah. It clearly is a comfortable piece of clothing and fashionable. But that is NOT the reason some of us wear it.

The Jubbah, my friends, is the traditional dress of the Arabs not the traditional dress of the Muslim.

I ain’t seen no Pakistani wearing a Jubbah in the pind (village).

We want to be upmarket. For some of us the Jubbah signifies our insistence that we are slightly more religious than the next man.

Brothers, what happened to the Indian style Kurta Pajama? Where did that magnificent outfit go? Hang your heads in shame.

There are many moments when I truly do despair.

But none compares to the moment I see a once proud, dignified, giant of a man reach middle age and swap his Shalwaar Kameez and Nara for a Jubbah.

What a ****.