Dear Massi, I am only married a year and my wife has moved back into her parents house.

She says my house is too over-crowded and says we can’t be intimate without everyone knowing what we’re doing.

I don’t know what to do as I can’t afford to move out yet.

I spent all my savings on the wedding. She wants me to move into her parents house with her. I admit we didn’t tell her and her family how many people live here, but she would never have agreed to marry me if I was honest. 

I can’t move into her house as my family would say I am not 'a real man'.

But my wife won’t move back here. I really don’t know how to handle this.

Massi says: It is understandable that your new wife is upset after you misled her about the living arrangements.

You and your wife should talk about feasible options.

Tell her that you want to reach a compromise that you both agree on.

Discuss a time frame in which you can both save money for a home together.

Rather than arguing about this issue or feeling that you are at a loss, tell your wife that you realise you made a mistake by not disclosing the full facts prior to the wedding. 

Explain that you now wish to find a practical solution and can only do so with her help.