Dear Massi, I don’t know what to do without causing more problems.

My brother’s wife is always shouting at him and calling him names publicly.

It breaks my heart to see this as he is such a sweet man who has never raised his voice towards anybody.

She talks down to him in such a derogatory way and always swears at him and doesn’t care that family are around.

The last time was at a wedding when she had a go at him in front of the bride and groom saying he gave them too much money as a present and complained that they were only invited to the valima and not the barat. My brother was mortified and had to call them after the wedding to apologise to them.

She loses her temper over small things and then throws him out of the house. He used to come to my parent’s house, but because it has happened so often, he is too embarrassed to tell my parents.

He admitted to me that he has slept overnight in the car on a few occasions. 
He said he can’t leave her as they have young children.
I want to help him but I don’t how.

Massi says: It is always difficult when we see that a loved one is facing an adverse situation.

Let your brother know that you are there to support him and listen to him.
You can advise him to speak to his GP who may direct him to a professional who may be able to help.

Ultimately, the vicious cycle that your brother is in the midst of can only break once he is ready to initiate a change himself.