Dear Massi, This is my first Ramadan with my in-laws. My in-laws are so different to my family which is understandable.

But their table manners are disgusting.

My father-in-law slurps everything, from his cereal to his salan (curry). I have even seen him pick up his plate and lick it eat clean with his tongue.

My mother-in-law shovels food into her mouth and always burps loudly. It makes me feel sick listening to it and it’s really putting me off my sehri and iftari.

I have tried eating in my room, but then the parents get upset with me.

I have told my husband what the problem is, but he doesn’t get it.

The weird thing is, when he eats with his parents, he becomes just like them.

But when he’s eating with me alone, all of a sudden he remembers to eat like a civilised person.

I don’t know what to do.

Massi says, Living with your in-laws will always mean making compromises.

You have voiced some rather harsh criticisms of their dining etiquette.

Remember that it is likely that they have always eaten in this way and it would be unfair to expect that to change simply because it is not to your liking.

Try and adopt the spirit of Ramadan when approaching your in-laws and have some patience with them. It seems that they are keen to include you in their activities as a family member. 

Don’t focus on how they eat but try and distract yourself so that you do not get unnecessarily aggravated.

After Ramadan, you can change your eating times so that it does not always coincide with theirs.