Dear Massi, I am so angry. My husband gave his mum a key to our house.

Now she comes over without calling, even when I am not home.

She even changed my bed sheets and cleaned my fridge and then told my husband I was keeping the house so dirty.

She has come over and cooked because she says I am not feeding my kids properly.
She is making me feel really inadequate.

My husband is such a mummy’s boy. He can’t see this as being an invasion of privacy. He thinks I should be happy his mum is doing the chores as it gives me ‘a break.’ I don’t know what to do.

Massi says, As much as your mother-in-law means well, this certainly is a breach of your privacy.

Whilst your husband will not doubt his mother’s intentions, her uninvited presence in your home is causing unnecessary disruption to your life.

Talk to your husband calmly- remember, it his mother you are talking about and he will naturally be inclined to show loyalty towards her.

Explain that you would like his mother to come over, but only at a convenient time.

Tell him that you choose to run your home in a way that you see fit and his mother’s involvement is causing a rift between you and her which you want to avoid.

Ask him to speak to his mother to let her know that she should call before arriving at you house and that she does not need to clean or cook when visiting you.