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Left alone by selfish man

4:40pm Friday 19th December 2008


Dear Massi, I have been with this guy for seven years.

He finished with me saying he was too old for this stuff. It’s been a month without him I miss him terribly.

I know you’re thinking get over it but he is the father of my daughter. Here’s me suffering in silence whilst he is out and about playing happy families. K Massi Says, I get the feeling you are holding back a lot of information about the relationship and there is more to the story.

Your statement that he is playing happy families suggests he has another family (maybe wife and kids) elsewhere. If this is the case you were foolish to keep seeing him for so long. He wanted to have his cake and you let him eat it for seven years. Learn from your mistakes and try not to make them again.

You might love him but he doesn't feel the same way about you because he has just walked away from your relationship and his daughter.

It is sad that he doesn't want to see his child but legally he has to provide financial support so I suggest you try and get this at the veryleast. Go to the Citizens Advice Bureau for information.

Regarding the depression it is natural to feel like this when someone lets you down and it will take a long time to recover. So have a cry and wallow in self-pity for a bit (it's part of the grieving process)but then you need to get back into gear if not for yourself then for your daughter.


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henna, West Mids says...
12:22am Tue 23 Dec 08

I guess he has chosen. You seem to be 2nd best and not at all.

Why do women weep over partners whom they knew are cheeting on their wifes. Do they not understand that if they can do that to a wife, then surely then can do that to a girlfriend.
Get over the sado and live for yoursrlf see good in what you do. Get a life.

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Muslim, says...
4:36pm Tue 23 Dec 08


Try hanging out with good friends who will keep you preoccupied and keep your mind free from sad thoughts. This is really important when someone leaves a relationship because it allows your mind to see new things and gradually move on from the past.

Don't try to get revenge or anything like that since it burns u up inside more, and u waste your time being sad. So instead move forward, be positive and turn to God for help (asking God gives you hope). It might be that He provides you a way out and makes life easier for you and your daughter.


It is possible that ye dislike a thing which is good for you, and that you love a thing which is bad for you. But Allah/God knows, and you know not. (Quran 2:216)


what to do if your friend gets heart-broken;

http://www.ummah.net
/forum/showthread.ph
p?t=184935



Peace.

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henna, West Mids says...
11:34pm Thu 25 Dec 08

It is good to look for guidance from the higher forces. Yet we know we create our reality and only we can get ourselves out of it.
God only helps when we take the first step to break free from all bonds.
Revenge burns the person and we stay attached to the situation and only harm ourselves. So focus on friends, new course, visit the library find books to read or go and watch a film, go for a coffe with your daughter if you like she cannot have coffee, but you know what I mean. Have a day out. Park may be a little cold at this time. Think of the situation as his loss. Foucs on positives you have had previously in your life and would like more of again. Being tied up to a person who do not value you and your/his child. What could be sad for that. One pays for it, maybe not now, but time to come. So do not dwell on that time, make something of that time for yourself.

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zahida iftikhar, Blackburn says...
10:09am Mon 26 Jan 09

Oh! woman do you not know the old saying , if hes don this to his wife what stops him from doing to you. have you considered he might have found another woman.i am not rubbing salt to the wounds, i think you should talk to his wife,because the girl in Question ur daughter has a right to know her half brothers and sisters.I know how hard it will be.think this way what if you were the wife and his wife was in your place , wouldnt you want to know where he goes and spends the most money, men like him they make their wifes life hell.by telling her you might do a favour for he!if i was the wife i would want to know honestly.

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zahida iftikhar, Blackburn says...
10:49am Mon 26 Jan 09

I think you should tell his wife if your going for child support, after what you two have done i think she has a right to know, you have been seeing him for seven years and he cheated on his wife with you.this much you do owe her, and your daughter needs to know her half brother and sister at first it will be hard once she has been excepted then it will be easy. nothing in life is too easy.i bet at home he`s acting holy and thou.you realy need to talk to her,don`t brush it under the carpet.when he has to pay for u and his wife it`ll knock him for a six trust me!

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