3:48pm Thursday 24th January 2008
Dear Massi, I have only been in this country for over a year now.
I got married to my husband in Pakistan and things were going really well. The marriage was arranged and we both met each other and spent time with one another before we were married.
I adore his family and I think they like me.
But the past month has been hell. I have started to suspect that he only married me because his family made him. I have sensed after talking to some people that he was going out with someone before and has started seeing this other woman again.
I think that men from here think that all women from abroad are good for nothing but taking care of their families. They also think we are stupid and don't know how to use mobile phones, read credt card statements or use the internet.
I tried my best to be a good wife and this is how he treats me.
If he wanted to get married to this other girl then why did he wed me?
His family will obviously take his side when everything comes out and then where will I go?
I am confused and don't know where else to turn. I feel like killing myself.
Massi Says, You need to speak to your husband in a calm manner, and tell him how you feel and also tell him what you suspect is going on.
It might be all innocent and maybe there is another explanation to things.
But you have to be honest about these things both with him and his family.
He needs to know that his actions are hurting you. Speak to his parents and explain the situation to them.
You say you get on well with them. They may be more sympathetic than you think.
You have to understand that this is not your fault and although you might feel down and confused with things there are people who can help you through this.
If it turns out that he is also with another woman the decision to stay with him or leave is yours and no-one else's.
First and foremost though you need to find out the truth and put things in the clear because at the moment this mental torture must be unbearable.
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