With the Christmas period approaching Muslims have been given new guidelines in how not to attract undue attention.
The Association of Muslims With Nothing Better To Do (or AMWNBTD for short) says Muslims should take on the following advice.
1) If you don’t want your child to take part in a nativity play - don’t say it in public.
2) Office workers must not bemoan Christmas decorations.
3) Wear a poppy all the way into the new year to make sure everyone sees it 4) Don’t make anti-Turkey comments of any kind.
5) Mince pies are fine – they do not have meat in them.
6) Saying Merry Christmas will not make you a Christian.
7) Just because Santa has a beard does not make him Muslim, even though we all know he is.
8) Muslim males must not stand underneath any holly at any time.
9) Do not use the terms or phrases IS, ISIS, Islamic State, Taliban, Al-Qaeda, 'It wasn't Osama's fault', 'I have to go and pray now' during a Christmas party.
10) And most importantly at no point say ‘Christmas is haram.’ The advice is being sent out to all mosques, mosque teachers and 'community leaders' in the coming week.
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