We end-up fighting over anything (From Asian Image)
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We end-up fighting over anything
11:20am Sunday 25th December 2011 in Dear Massi By Massi
Dear Massi, I recently got married and although my married life with my husband is good we always end up fighting.
Reasons like him not having no friends - him watching the TV on a Sunday non stop for seven hours.
For instance as we live in a joint family his parents have gone abroad with his sisters and two brothers. thus we have the house to ourselves.
Instead of spending time with me he’s watching TV and I am upstairs emailing you!.
Massi Says, I am really sorry to hear that you are going through this.
As a newly married couple you guys should certainly be spending loads of quality time together as well as some time apart but your husband’s behaviour does sound odd.
It sounds like he is still stuck in his single ways and has not realised that he has another very important person in his life who wants some attention from him. Watching TV for seven hours is indeed excessive.
As his family are abroad this is the ideal opportunity to spend some quality time together to get to know one another and certainly to get intimately acquainted.
I would take this time on your own to have some very serious discussions about what you each want out of the relationship.
I know that this may be difficult but he needs to know how you feel.
Perhaps he is unsure of what is expected of him as a new husband and if you guys continue to spend so much time apart then this issue will never resolve itself.
Perhaps arrange to go out somewhere to have a meal or go watch a movie and start a conversation about how you feel married life is going.
Tell him that you want to be with him and that you don’t feel that you have got know him well enough and want to take some time to get to know him better. He may well be flattered that you are making such an effort.
Communication is definitely the key and you need to start doing a lot more of it otherwise your relationship will be severely affected. All the very best of luck.
Muslim says...
3:45pm Tue 27 Dec 11
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1 - Give him 'space', guys when they're angry feel they need their own time to think of their problems.
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2 - Give him Respect, this is the basis of all perfect marriages. The Girl respects the guy, and in return the Guy shows Love to the wife. And vice versa. This is the perfect cycle in any marriage.
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3 - Ignore any arguments, dont drag old arguments into your future. That brings back bad feelings.
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4 - If you do that, he might start realising your patience with him and might act back positively in return. But you have to show you are the 'better example' without explicitly telling him you are doing a favour. Because this is all to make your marriage successful (so its for the both of you.)
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5 - ask for more support at islamicboard dt cm :)