Comedian and actor Tez Ilyas takes on the world’s favourite agony aunt in this special edition of Dear Massi.

Dear Massi, My sister-in-law gave me a bag of her ‘fat clothes’ and said I should wear them as they will fit me.

She was trying to act as if she was being nice by saying she had spent a lot of money on these clothes and she didn’t want to see them wasted.

And since she lost weight she had to buy a whole new wardrobe for herself. I am really angry.

Who does she think she is first of all giving me her second hand clothes and secondly giving her clothes because I am apparently 'fat enough' to wear her old things. 

I said no thanks and she should just give them to charity.

She said I was acting arrogantly and that she was only trying to be nice
We have only met once since then but it was a bit frosty between us.

I am not in the wrong, but should I be waiting for an apology?

Massi says: It is a personal opinion whether one chooses to wear second hand clothes or not.

Your sister-in-law may well have been sincere in her intentions and your personal opinion about wearing second hand clothes may have directed your judgement in the incident.

You have not indicated that you had a strained relationship with your sister-in-law prior to this episode. 

Instead of letting this incident ruin your relationship with your sister-in-law, consider it to be a misunderstanding from both of you.

Talk to your sister-in-law and tell her that you appreciate her gesture but that you would prefer not to wear second hand clothes.

Tell her that there is nothing personal in your decision and that you hope you can both be friends again.

Tez says, I hear what you’re saying. You want revenge. Teek eh. Let me have a think...Got it.

Here’s what to do: take the bin bag of clothes off her and thank her for being so generous.

Next: take her out every day, make sure she has no time for the gym, go to dessert parlours, steak places, all that.  

When she gets fat again and complains that her clothes don’t’ fit her, say: ‘oh don’t worry sis, I’ve got these third-hand clothes you can have’ and give her back her original ‘fat clothes’! You’re welcome.