Dear Massi, My husband’s younger brother is getting married and it is causing me a lot of problems.

My in-laws are being very unfair.

I am the eldest daughter-in-law, but they didn’t approve of me.
They wanted my husband to marry someone else.

On my wedding, I only got two sets of jewellery and they were both artificial sets.

I only got five new suits given to me and my parents didn’t get any presents.

But the new sister-in-law is the daughter of a family friend and my in-laws are making it clear that they approve of this wedding.

They have bought her five gold sets of jewellery and have bought her ten new outfits.

Her parents and aunts and even cousins are all getting presents.
It’s really unfair.

They haven’t even invited my parents to the wedding, only to the Walima.

I’m really insulted.

As usual, my husband ignores it and says I’m making a big deal out of nothing. Do you think I am?

Massi says, It is understandable that you feel there is a discrepancy in how you and your future sister-in-law are being treated by your in-laws.

However, you did not marry your husband to avail of the gifts his parents were going to give you.

Although there is a tradition to exchange gifts during the course of the wedding, it should not affect your marriage.

Try not to look at your wedding and the upcoming wedding from a materialistic perspective.

Rather, try to enjoy the celebrations.

No doubt you will play an integral role in the ceremonies, so try to focus on the joyous occasion instead of quantifying the gifts.