Dear Massi, It has been three years since I am married into this family. 

I have a post graduate qualification and I earn more money than 2 of my brother-in -laws combined. 

Yet the in-laws refer to me as 'the bahoo that can't cook.'

They give no importance to academic credentials. All they care about is the fact that I can't make rotee and salan and pilau.

They are so shocked by this, like my parents failed majorly in my upbringing.

Even their friends make comments when they meet me. 

A relative of theirs came over from Canada, and the first thing she said to me laughingly was 'oh, tum to ghar ki nikamee bahoo ho' -(you're the useless one out of the daughter- in-laws.)

My husband is the only graduate in the family, and he ignores these comments. 

It's easier for him to be so dismissive but I'm the one who isthe target of the comments. 

Massi says, Unfortunately it is very difficult to change deep rooted cultural standards and expectations. 

Whilst your focus and your family's focus has been on education, it seems the priorities of your in-laws are entirely different. 

As hurtful as it is, ask yourself if saying anything to them will change their perspective?

You are correct to say that it is easier for your husband to be dismissive of such comments. 

However, try and rise above such petty comments.

You know the value of your education. If others don't, it is their loss, not yours.