Dear Massi, Me and my husband are separated. We should be divorced in a couple of months time.
He has since had another nikah.
After he returned from the honeymoon, he called me with a job offer.
He asked me if I could come to his house every day to cook food for him and his wife and clean the house while my kids are at school.
He said his new wife works full time and is a terrible cook and that she supports this idea.
I am disgusted by this proposition. He is literally treating me like a maid.
He says I am overreacting, that it's a straightforward job offer.
Then he insulted me by saying that it would be very difficult for me to find flexible work with my lack of qualifications.
Am I am being too egotistical?
Massi says, Whilst the arrangement presented to you is an unorthodox one, the decision lies with you.
Your reaction is certainly not an 'overreaction,' but rather a natural response.
Your tone suggests you are affronted by this offer. If you feel 'insulted,' simply decline the offer.
Perhaps your ex-husband was not being insensitive or hurtful, but from his perspective he was just being practical.
However, his reasoning behind the job offer is a demeaning one by implying you cannot find a job of your own accord.
Trust you own gut instinct- if this is something you cannot contemplate, then let him know in a peremptory manner.
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