Dear Massi, I have been going out with a man for over two years now.
I wanted to get married but he kept delaying it making all these excuses.
We see each other a few evenings a week.
I had no reason to doubt him until he showed me his new work phone. He has a personal mobile and a work mobile.
He went into the other room to answer his other phone, so I started looking at the features of his new work phone.
In the photos, there was only one picture of a screenshot of flights that had been booked with a woman's name and 2 other names.
I got suspicious because my boyfriend told me he had a 10 day work trip coming up.
After he left I looked up that woman on Facebook. Her profile picture was with my boyfriend and 2 boys.
I could only see a few pictures as her page is private, but each picture is of them as a family and even one picture where someone has commented 'Mashallah, happy 10th anniversary.'
I'm absolutely devastated.
I saved the pictures on my phone and sent them to him and demanded that he explain himself.
He rang me and got really flustered and started mumbling all this stuff about being separated but still living together and that this holiday was the last one before filing for divorce, but wouldn't it be easier if we just had a nikah as it's permitted in the religion.
I can't believe he is living a lie and dragging me into it too.
I'm really confused because I really do love him.
Massi says ,You have every right to be angry.
This man has spent 2 year's of your life telling you lies and cheating on his wife and 2 children.
It is clear that saying he was separated from his wife was just a means to appease you, as was the rather limp offer to have a nikah with you.
Your boyfriend seems to be taking his infidelity very lightly.
Put yourself in his wife's shoes and imagine the hurt you would feel.
If he has spent 2 year's cheating on his wife with you, it is more than apparent that his commitment to you will never be a formal one.
It is you who must take a stand and walk away from this toxic relationship.