Abusing the system will backfire on us (From Asian Image)

Abusing the system will backfire on us

5:07pm Monday 1st June 2009

• Print
• Email
• Share
• Comments(0)

The authorities have seen a dramatic rise in Asian women contacting them to report heir husbands for abusing them physically or emotionally.

Women in our community have to put up with a lot and truth be told I would say culturally the system favours the man.

The way the police and volunteer organisations have acted to protect vulnerable women must be welcomed. Some of these women have nowhere else to turn.

With the breakdown of the extended family structure I do not feel issues like this should be simply swept under the carpet.

But in recent years I also have seen a marked rise in the number of Asian men and families who have are left with very little after being wrongly accused of emotional or domestic abuse.

Amongst the legitimate cases there are a fair few bogus ones too, leading to many fathers being unable to see their children and granted limited access.

Do not get me wrong I do not in any shape or form believe in any form of abuse and violence towards anyone.

I am quite sure I will get accusations thrown at me that I am a chauvinistic pig (or swine as it seems to be a popular word at the moment).

But, I have come across some men both here and from abroad who live in fear of what might happen.

One man told me his wife says, ‘I don’t need you... the council will house me and I will get benefits and survive better without you.’ Not a great foundation to have a relationship on, and ever increasing stories are flying around about separations and so on.

The crucial point is that these women and men make the job of the local police even harder.

By abusing the system for short-term gain they ensure the real victims in our community remain hidden.

We as a community need to remember that the state is not there to be used for our own personal vendettas.

Similarly, for men the message is - talk about issues rather than letting them fester and allowing the situation to effect not only you, your partner and your children.

All men and women should put their children first and not have an attitude such as ‘I want all the money and the house.’

• Print
• Email
• Share
• Comments(0)